Im thankful for my family

I am so extreemly blessed to have my family. I have a mother who is kind, strong, and patient, and has always been willing to sacrifice anything for me. I have a father who can't take a hint, has the biggest heart of anyone I know, and knows how to crack me up. I have a sister who has never betrayed herself and what she knows to be truth, is the nerdiest person i know, and who has always been watching my back, catching me when I stumble. I have a brother who taught me what true friendship means, who is sensitive and caring even if your the last person on the whole earth that he wants to see or talk to or drive around, and does more service without realizing it then anyone I know.
Often times, I come home and release all the anger, frustration, and sadness that has gathered up inside of me all day. I imagine i'm not a very fun person to be around for my family. Despite that, I've never felt unwelcome or unloved in my house. They've all been so patient with me and I love them all more than anything.

That awkward moment when...

You call out someones name in a crowded area and multiple people turn around to look at you.
You realize the kid sitting next to you is picking his nose.
you bend over to pick up something and you just KNOW he's checking you out.
You start talking to someone on the phone and then after, like, five minutes you realize your talking to their voicemail.
You accidently hug someone you don't know.
You think something is funnier then everyone else around you.
Someone tells you something and you don't quite hear it, so you say "what?" And they tell you again but in the middle of their sentence you got destracted so you say "what?" Again and they tell you one more time and you still just don't understand what their telling you so you just laugh and say oh.
You fall asleep while talking on the phone.
You look down and notice he's... um... happy...
You start texting someone and neither of you know how to end the conversation so you end up sending different smily faces back and forth for like, an hour.
Someone says a prayer really quietly and you can't tell when the prayer is over so you either say amen to early or too late.
You realized that you've just looked through all of someones pictures on facebook.
You hold up your hand for a high five and get left hanging.
Someones walking towards you in the hallway and you both react to late and you both sidestep the same way and then you both sidestep the other way and it continues like an awkward dance until you eventually find a way around eachother.
You see someone and you go in for a handshake and he goes in for a hug.
You finish a slowdance with someone you don't know and you aren't sure if you should hug or not.
You text someone either late at night or early in the morning and realize you've just woken them up.
You forget someones name.
You mean to say something under your breath but everyone seems to hear you.
You think the line is moving forward so you take a step forward and so do the people behind you so your stuck uncomfortably close to the person in front of you.
You stare off in the distance to daydream and then you realize your staring at someone.
You walk up to your friends who are chatting and right when you say hi they stop talking.
You accidently start clapping after a musical number in church.
You notice someone you kinda know in the hallway and your not sure if you should say hi or not.
The creepy long haired guy in his 40's watches you walk past his house through his window.
You turn around and someone scares you, but you don't know who they are.
Its really quiet in your class and you sneeze really loud.
Everyone else around you gets a joke and you just don't.
You think someones waving at you so you wave back and they were actually waving to someone behind you.
Your stomach growls in middle of class.
The guys around are talking about hot girls you know.
You say amen really loudly.
You say goodbye, and then both end up walking the same way.
You politely say "you too" when its not necisarry.

Life is good

"Now therefore be not grieved, nor angry with yourselves," -Genesis 45:5

 "And out of small things proceedeth that which is great" -D&C 64:33

 "faith is the power, obedience is the price, love is the motive, the spirit is the key, and Christ is the reason." -James E. Faust

 "if we are striving to live Christ like lives, how others see us should be of little consequence." -Neil A. Maxwell

 "and be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." - Ephesians 4:32

 "be patient in afflictions, for thou shalt have many; but endure them, for, lo, i am with thee, even unto the end of thy days." -D&C 24:8

 "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" -Philippians 4:12

 "I take pleasures in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in distress for Christ's sake: for when i am weak, then i am strong." -2 Cor. 12:10

 "In the midst of a crooked and preverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world" -Philippians 2:15

 "Behold I am the light. look unto me, and endure to the end, and ye shall live; for unto him that endureth to the end will i give eternal life." -3 Nephi 15:8

 "Patience permits us to cling to faith in the lord when we are tossed about by surf. when the undertow grasps us we will realize that we are somehow being carried forward even as we tumble. We are actually being helped as we cry for help." -Neil A. Maxwell

 "Dont you quit, you keep trying, there is help and happiness ahead." -Elder Jeffery R. Holland

 Forgiveness by Sydni Masoncup
To Forgive
Is not to forget.
To forgive
Is really to remember,
That nobody is perfect,
That each of us stumbles
when we want so much to stay upright,
that each of us says things
we wish we had never said,
that we can all forget that love
is more important than being right.
To forgive
is to really remember
that we are so much more then our mistakes,
that we are often more kind and caring
than we think we are,
that accepting another's flaws
can help us accept our own.
To forgive
is to remember,
that the odds are pretty good that
we might soon need to be forgiven ourselves,
that life gives us more than we can handle gracefully
to forgive
is to remember,
that we have room in our hearts to
begin again,
and again,
and again.

 "If you live up to your privileges, the angels cannot be restrained from being your associates."

 "Be a women of Christ. Cherish your esteemed place in the sight of God. He needs you. This church needs you."

"Do yo think for a moment that heavenly father would send one of his children to this earth by accident without the possibility of a significant work to preform?... My dear friends, you are a royal generation. You were preserved to come to the earth at this time for a special purpose. Not just a few of you, but all of you. There are things for each of you to do that no one else can do as well as you." -Bishop H Burke Peterson

The Lonely

2 a.m., where do I begin?

Crying off my face again

The silent sounds of loneliness

wants to follow me to bed

I'm a ghost of a girl that I want to be most

I'm the shell of a girl that I used to know well

Dancing slowly in an empty room

Can the lonely take the place of you?

I sing myself a quiet lullaby

Let you go and let the lonely in to take my heart again

Too afraid to go inside 

for the pain of one more loveless night

but the loneliness will stay with me

and hold me 'til i fall asleep

I'm a ghost of a girl that I want to be most

I'm the shell of a girl that I used to know well

Dancing slowly in an empty room

Can the lonely take the place of you?

I sing myself a quiet lullaby

Let you go and let the lonely in to take my heart again

Broken pieces of

A barely breathing story

where there once was love

now there's only me and the lonely

Dancing slowly in an empty room

Can the lonely take the place of you?

I sing myself a quiet lullaby

Let you go and let the lonely in to take my heart again

I wish it had rained.

Do you ever had one of those days where everything goes your way, but by the end of the day you feel worthless and just downright depressed? For me, that was today. It was a really fun day! I was with my friends and having a great time. But for some reason life just didn't feel right. These are the days when I desperatly wanna lock myself in the ballroom room, turn off the lights, turn on some music, and dance and cry. These are the days when a simple hug from my close friends mean the most to me. These are the days when I look in the sky and pray that it will rain so I can dance in it. These are the days that bring me closer to the people around me and to my god. On days like this I wish I had just one friend that I didn't have to be fake around.

I wish it had rained today.

To: my hubby

Dearest future husband,
Hello! This is 16 year old Sara. I hope you are doing well. I just wanted to write you a little note about my expectations and dreams about you. This is partly for you to understand who I was and who I've become better, and its for me to be sure before I marry you that I've held the standards and expectations for my husband that I've had from the beginning.

So I imagine that right now your pretty close to my age (probably either a year older or a year younger). You are taking seminary and planning on graduating both seminary and high school. Your gonna go on a mission and are currently saving up for it. You are getting pretty decent grades and planning on going to at least a little bit of colledge. Hygine is pretty important to you. you get brownie points if your a dancer, a runner, a singer, or play and instrument of somekind. You also get brownie points if you have abs, white teeth, great hair, pretty eyes, and if your a little taller then me.

You are a chill guy. You love to laugh and have fun. Your confident, but not arrogent. Your humble and not afraid to tell me I'm beautiful(even if I'm not). We have our fair share of awkward moments, but that never stops us from having fun. You look me in the eyes when we talk to eachother. Your passionate and caring. You like to cuddle and give me big hugs(and somehow you always can tell when I need one). You hold me when I'm crying, distract me when I'm scared, and make me laugh when I'm feeling down. Chastity is very important to you, and your whole life you strive to be better everyday then you were the day before. Your good with children and you want to have kids. You like pets and food.

If everything goes as I would like it to, when we first meet we would be at some kind of colledge party. We would hit it off, and then we become aquantances for a bit. Eventually we start hanging out and discovering more and more about eachother. We would have a lot in common, and things that we dissagree on. When you ask me to marry you we will be best friends. I will have told you things I have never told anyone else.

Thanks for sacrificing the little things. Thank you for being strong. I love you with my whole heart.
Love,
Sara Michelle
Ps: yes, I have already named our children. One of the boys will be named Isaac. :)